Celestial Waltz

Celestial Waltz


The dinner was turning out to be a rather bleak affair. We were all dressed in our best clothes. Trousers pressed, shirts crisp and clean. It was a grand meal of the ceremonial vegetarian dishes. No meat was served as this was a time to celebrate life, no death could be present at the table.
I looked around the cold, vacuous room at my Mother and Brother, both looked despondent. My little Brother maneuvered a piece of unidentifiable greenery around his plate. My mother simply sat eating slowly and methodically, almost as if she were on automatic pilot. I knew we were all fighting back a renewed grief. It was supposed to be a time of celebration but all we could think about was the person we lost all those years ago. Every holiday the grief shot through us. This was the worst holiday of all. My palms were sweating already, I was so nervous. I fought to choke down the tears that desperately fought to be released. I knew that if I broke, if the new man of the house broke everyone would break. I couldn’t , I couldn’t be soft anymore, especially today.

“Mum, do you want anymore…Mum please don’t cry” .
I cupped her tiny hand in my own to comfort her. She sat there shaking, she was too strong to weep but tears crept down her face. My face grew hot, my jaw clenched.
I looked over to my brother, who had never been the same after we lost him. He never cried he wanted to be strong like him and I, but I wasn’t strong.
“Jack, you OK?”
“Yeah, Mum it’s OK, I miss him too”
My brother moved round the table through the empty, cold atmosphere of the room. He stopped at my Mother’s side. We both embraced her. We knew how hard today would be for her.
“You know we don’t have to do this if you don’t want to”.
She dabbed the tears with the corner of her napkin.
“Yes son, we do, I’ll be fine. Thanks boys, now go and finish your-”.
The antique clock on the small mantle piece began it’s dirge-like chime. We all stared at the clock as it chimed through the silence. It was time to go. My Mother rose to her feet, placing her napkin down neatly, she crossed her knife and fork on the plate.
“OK boys we need to go now. Don’t be afraid, we will all feel better once it’s over.”
My brother gazed at his feet.
“Dan, what if…what if he’s not happy”
“I know I’m worried too, I’m sure he will be happy though. Come on lets all go out together.”

*   *   *   *

We stood in the face of the front door, Jack and I clasped my mother’s hand. We stood for a second to ready ourselves. Then all together we opened the door and stepped out onto the street.
Already we could see other families out on the street ready to observe the miracle that was soon to occur. The crisp night was still and silent. The street lights were already all switched off. The village was covered in shadow. I looked at the droves of people who stood outside with us. There was every kind of person, young, old,  families large and small. I was overcome by how, so many people could make absolutely no noise.

We all stood outside for what seemed to be an eternity, waiting.
“Mum, there are clouds. How will we know when it starts.”
“Jack, they will find a way to make themselves known to us. They have come all the way from heaven to see us again, clouds wont stop them’.
I looked up imagining what their journey from the spiritual plane must be like.
I smiled I was feeling better now.

Everyone felt the change. The air seemed to become static, slightly humid. Every pair of eyes were turned skyward. We knew it was about to begin, I felt the tears well into my eyes again and my hand started to shake. I felt my Brothers, hot little hand grip mine, he squeezed as I heard him begin to quietly cry.

The thick grey clouds overhead began to quiver and move in a spiral , it looked as if the hand of God were stirring them. The centre of the vortex seemed to swell, a low rumble echoed across the face of the Earth. Then a brilliant light pierced the cold darkness. There were some gasps from people. The pillar of light broke the shield of darkness like a mighty spear. A gouge in the cloud, miles across was formed and we stood directly underneath it. As the light began to fade people began to point and I could feel the sense of excitement build and build.

Through the chasm slowly dropped what looked like specks of purest light. They danced amongst themselves, it was like watching a celestial waltz. The dots twinkled and swirled like a school of fish as the descended to the Earth. There were billions of souls .
I was amazed at the very sight, I realised how lucky we were. Once in a half century the souls of those past as allowed to revisited their mortal coil and those left behind. Though I was afraid I would not see him in the plethora of shining lights.

My brother looked at me.
“I can see him”.
“Where?”
“He’s the brightest one of all, look”.
Jack pointed his finger at the centre of the vortex  of light. I smiled as I saw him. His light was indeed the brightest of all. As they approached the Earth individual lights split off and floated towards those they loved. I saw our light begin to move towards us. As he approached us, we all hugged each other in a tight circle.
“Mum..” I could finish my sentence.
“Don’t worry let him come to you”. My Mother’s face became bright as the light grew closer.

It floated over head for a second. Then it washed over us. My family was no longer with me. I was surrounded by light, my very core was warm and filled with love. I felt the presence of him with me. I threw my arms out in embrace. I felt him hug me. My soul was uplifted  all the worry disappeared all my grief was eased.
“I miss you, I hated the world for taking you away from me. I don’t want to be a man yet, I miss being a son.”
He whispered into my ear, something just for me.
“OK, I promise.”
As I finished speaking the light faded  but the warmth remained .I was back in the street with my Mother and Brother. Both of them had tears streaming down their faces. They had seen him as well.
I let the tears run down my cheeks, I smiled with a quivering lip.
“Mum, Dad’s OK isn’t he?”
My mother wiped the tears from my cheek.
“Yes son, he’s fine and he loves us all very much.” .